Last week I wrote about the idea of becoming more embodied, of moving more from our heads back into our multisensory bodies. This week I wanted to get really practical and give you some ideas of some ways to become more embodied.  

5,4,3,2,1 sensory game

A lovely exercise I often do when walking down the street is the 5-4-3-2-1 sensory awareness game. This simple but powerful practice helps shift my attention away from the constant chatter of the mind and back into the rich, multisensory experience of the present moment. 

It works like this: First, I take a moment to slowly look around and notice 5 things that I can see. Then I focus on 4 things that I can hear, these might be a car passing by, a bird singing in the distance, a cat meowing, someone speaking across the street. Next is to become aware of 3 things that I can feel via touch, the clothes I am wearing, the feel of my feet in my shoes, are there any subtle pains in my body. 

Moving on I tune into 2 things I can smell, it can be a passerby’s perfume, the scent of a flower, a lovely dinner smell wafting out of a neighbours house. Our sense of smell is deeply connected to the limbic system, the emotional control centre of the brain, so engaging it can evoke a sense of grounding and calm. Finally, I try to identify 1 distinct taste in my mouth, even if it’s just the subtle flavour of my own saliva, this is often the hardest! 

This simple 5-4-3-2-1 practice is a lovely way to interrupt the constant flow of our thoughts and tune into the immediacy of our physical experience. By systematically engaging each of our senses, we can cultivate a greater sense of presence, connection, and embodied awareness in our daily lives.

Breath

I remember Steve & I went interrailing across Europe one summer when we were in College. We were sitting in a train carriage travelling across the Czech Republic and quite a mystical guy entered our carriage. He had a vibe going on, he was really present and there was something very alluring about him. I remember he was Swiss and he told us about a 10 day silent meditation retreat he had been on called Vipassana that had transformed his life for the better.. 

At the time, Steve and I were the quintessential searchers, searching for more meaning so naturally we both felt drawn toward this! A year later we were volunteering in one of these Vipassana meditation centres in Massachusetts for a number of months and we had both sat one of these 10 day silent meditation retreats. The crux of the practice from my understanding was that the breath is the most immediate access point that we have to becoming present and aware of the vast world of sensations that you feel on your body at any moment. While you are reading this, right now, become more aware of your breath, are you breathing shallow or deep? Are your breaths long or short? As you tune into your breath, very often you can become aware of the subtle flow of energy around your body. 

I believe the breath provides the easiest way to get ‘out of your head’ and ‘back in your body’. I wrote a previous happier Column on Breath and the opportunity tuning into our breath more can have. This primal life force flowing through us becomes a gateway, reminding us that we are not just disembodied minds, but fully embodied, sensing creatures. Meditation and mindfulness are two practices that typically use the breath as a touchstone to becoming very aware of all the sensations that are happening in your body here and now. That is why meditation, mindfulness and any form of breathwork can be incredible tools at reconnecting you and bringing you back into your body.

Dance

My daughters have regularly referred to my dance skills as deeply embarrassing! Both Steve and me in our heads are fantastic dancers but in reality we are usually perceived as wild lunatics! Our brother Mark is a DJ, back when we were in our 20’s Mark used to DJ in nightclubs in Dublin and we used to love to go support him. We would take our veg van and head in for the night, sleep in the van after and then go straight to Dublin fruit market at 5am! I remember so distinctly, Steve and I were such enthusiastic dancers that we would get a tap on the shoulder consistently and a young guy would say to us ‘mate, do you have any pills’?!! We didn’t drink or take any pills, we just loved the feeling of letting loose on the dance floor and literally losing ourselves to the music.

Dancing is one of the most ancient and universal forms of human expression, with a rich history that stretches back thousands of years across cultures. From ritual dances performed to honour the divine, to joyful celebrations marking rites of passage, to communal festivities that bring people together – dance has long been inextricably woven into the fabric of the human experience. Psychologically, the act of moving our bodies in sync with music has been shown to stimulate the release of endorphins, foster a sense of connection, and induce altered states of consciousness – all of which can contribute to a profound experience of embodied freedom and transcendence.

As a 44-year-old man who grew up primarily focused on sports, dancing did not come as naturally to me. However, after giving up alcohol at age 21, I found myself turning to dance as a way to stay energised and engaged at parties, rather than simply sitting on the sidelines. Over the years, I’ve come to deeply appreciate dance as one of the greatest joys that exist. When you lose yourself to the rhythm and flow of the music, the sense of freedom and unity that arises is truly second to none. Whereas many adults only dance a few times a year, such as at weddings after copious amounts of alcohol, I believe dance is an essential human experience that can help us fully engage our bodies and spirits, lifting us up in a deeply embodied way.

Growing some of your food

Last week I started sprouting again. I am growing some of the most nutritious food possible in a large jar on my kitchen counter! A friend, Doug Evans, who wrote the book ‘how to grow sprouts’ visited us last week to be a guest on our podcast. He inspired me to get back sprouting. There is something deeply connecting about growing our own food, we appreciate it more, do not waste it, and get to pour our love and energy into it over a period of time. I believe growing food gives us a wonderful opportunity to become more embodied.

These activities all have the power to reconnect us with the incredible sensory experience of being fully present in our physical bodies.There are literally millions of things you can do to become more embodied from walking, running, cycling, yoga, going to the gym etc that all bring you back in more awareness of the incredible multi sensory body that you inhabit. 

When we live more embodied, we cultivate a deeper sense of presence, aliveness, and connection. We become less caught up in the incessant chatter of the mind and more attuned to the rich tapestry of sights, sounds, textures, and sensations that are always available to us. This embodied awareness can help reduce stress, enhance our appreciation for the world around us, and infuse our lives with a greater sense of wonder and vitality.

My main point here is that when you are ‘living more in your body’ you are more likely to be present, aware in the here and now and less likely to be caught up with anxieties etc. What do you think? What do you do to become more embodied? Are there specific things you do to bring you back in your body?

As always, thanks again for taking the time to read this. If you enjoyed it you can find my other Happier Articles here.

Have a lovely week, Dave x

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2

As I sit on the padded floor of my 11-month-old daughter Fia’s room, I marvel at her embodied state of being. She is fully engaged with her primitive, mammal mode of exploring movement and discovering what her body can do. Fundamentally embodied, Fia is sensing, feeling, and interacting with her environment through the innate wisdom of her physical form. She is fully engaged and present in her body, marveling and curious.

This column is building on last weeks’ ‘Happier’ Column titled The Comfort Trap where I laid out the idea that our excess of modern comforts could likely be contributing to less fulfilment, joy and happiness. With the massive rise of humans sitting for a prolonged amount of time, and most work nowadays being office based, I sometimes think that – as a society – we are starting to see our bodies as simply a vehicle to transport our brains around. Today’s column is about the idea of becoming more physically embodied as a way to feel a little happier. In essence, to move more from our heads to our hearts and bodies, to become more ‘embodied’ and maybe a little bit more whole.

Dis-embodied?
The other day, I was walking down the street and counted 10 people who I walked past who had their head buried in their phone nearly walking into me or a lamp post! I have definitely been guilty of doing that too, so I am definitely not judging. It just made me even more aware of how modern life with all its alluring screens and fancy technologies is drawing us away from our physical form and the wonder of the world around us.

I can’t help but believe that reclaiming this sense of physical embodiment could be a key to greater happiness and fulfilment. I believe that when we are fully present in our senses, attuned to the rhythms and needs of the body, we are more likely to experience the richness of the here and now. All great sages say the same thing: that life happens here and now, and I believe that fully inhabiting our body and engaging with our senses is key to this.

A few years ago, Steve and I went to an event in London. It was in an industrial estate in North London in a private show kitchen and it blew us away. It was a sensorial dinner. The first course we were given nose pegs and invited to put them on. The chef explained that our sense of smell (olfactory glands) is directly linked to our taste. This is why wine tasters slurp their wine, to get more air passing across the surface of the wine so they can ‘taste’ the wine via their nose! 

But back to the story: the first course we put on these nose pegs and were given a black jelly and asked to guess what we could taste. Neither of us could taste a thing. When we removed the nose peg and tasted again, our taste receptors were flooded with an explosive taste of red berries, the black colour was simply to mislead us. The evening progressed with another course where we had to wear headphones with certain music that influenced the taste and we had  to rub our hand on a rough surface while eating our dessert to show how touching a rough surface makes us experience more of a crunch like taste

The sensorial dinner experience really emphasised the power of fully engaging our senses to be present in our bodies and delight in the richness of the moment. It made us acutely aware that modern life, for all its wonders, often pulls us away from this embodied state of awareness, keeping us trapped in the distracted, busy hum of daily routines. By reconnecting to the wisdom of our physical form, we can cultivate a greater sense of aliveness, presence, and connection – key ingredients for a happier human experience.

Is the body just a means to transport our brain around?

At the moment, a part of me is slightly  worried that much of modern life relegates the body to a mere vehicle for the brain. Yet the body and brain are inextricably linked, connected by the same nervous system. By becoming more embodied, life has the potential to become richer in the true sense of the word – not just materially, but in our ability to connect more deeply, feel more intensely, and harmonise with ourselves, one another, and the natural world. Moving beyond seeing the body as secondary to the mind opens up profound possibilities for self-awareness, belonging, and joy.

Wrapping it up

I invite you to reflect on your own relationship to your body. What practices or experiences help you to feel more grounded, alive, and present in your physical form? Whether it’s mindful breathing, dancing, hiking in nature, or simply making a concerted effort to unplug from screens, I believe that by doing so we are nurturing an essential aspect of the human experience. 

For in doing so, we just may unlock the keys to a richer, more joyful existence. I’m curious to hear your thoughts – what helps you to feel more embodied? 

Next week I plan to write about my favourite ways to become more embodied! Thank you so much as always for reading, I greatly appreciate it. 

Have a lovely weekend. 

Dave x

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2

Earlier this year we were in Boston for work and were lucky enough to be taken to see a Boston Celtic’s Basketball game. It was so spectacular yet completely overwhelming! Coming from Greystones, a small town in Ireland right by the sea, this massive indoor circus like stadium was a jarring contrast. The constant noise, bright lights, massive screens and relentless stimulation of the packed crowd and non-stop parade of action on the court felt almost alien to my ancient, evolutionary self. I felt very much like a country mouse in the big city!

Don’t get me wrong, it was an incredible experience to witness. But it also felt like the apex of modern culture – a captivating, high-energy spectacle that made me think of ancient Roman gladiators in the Colosseum. The stark juxtaposition between my nature-immersed life in Ireland and this urban sports cathedral left me feeling slightly out of place, as if my primal instincts were at odds with the frenetic pace and overstimulation of this modern entertainment circus extravaganza!

The contradiction of comfort

As I sit here on a comfortable couch with a comfortable blanket draped around me to keep me warm while sipping on a delicious drink of warm cacao, I can’t help but feel a nagging feeling of unease. My ancient primal self feels trapped in the comforts of modern life – heating, soft fabrics, lighting, excess of processed foods. A deep seated primal part of me, yearns to be more embodied, to be more connected to the natural landscape, outside in the natural world with all my senses fully engaged. 

I am fascinated by the contradictions of modern life. On one hand, the technological advancements and innovation across every sector would have been impossible to even contemplate 100 years ago. However on the other hand we live in an environment of unprecedented ease and comfort which goes against our evolutionary hardwiring. As I dig deeper into this topic, I can’t help but feel that our cushy, sedentary lifestyle packed with time saving devices, isolated living and constant convenience is profoundly at odds with the lives of our ancestors and the evolutionary programming hardwired into our genes. 

Humans have supposedly been around for about 300,000 years. 99%+ of this time life was uncomfortable and tough. Our ancestors spent their days roaming the natural environment in search of food, exerting themselves physically all day long and relying on their senses to survive. In Spite of the fact that life was hard, there were some silver linings, they lived in tight tribes, ate natural food from the environment and lived harmoniously with the natural habitat in a very physical embodied way.

Embracing discomfort

My daily sunrise swim in the cold Irish Sea is a way that I lean into this ‘comfort trap’. Even though I have done this daily for nearly a decade, 98% of the time I don’t feel like getting into that cold sea. It’s uncomfortable but I do so as I know that on the other side of this discomfort is a place of joy and gratitude, a much better version of myself. As a dear friend Mark says ‘I don’t always love the person getting in, but I always love the person getting out’.

Over the last three years Stephen and myself and some friends have embarked on an annual physical challenge that requires training and a journey of sorts to get ourselves physically fit to try to achieve our challenge. Three years ago we ran the Causeway Coastal Path up in Northern Ireland which was 52 km, this was the first time we had run that distance. Last year we took up swimming, having never swam a km before. We trained all summer long and swam 7 km from the nearby town of Bray to Greystones. 

Our annual adventure 

This year we are training to run the Wicklow Way, a former pilgrim path across the Wicklow mountains where we live from Dublin to Carlow. We plan to do it over two days in September, all 127 km of it, so just over 60km per day. These adventures are a way for us to reconnect and lean into discomfort. They are very much about the journey, much of the training I don’t feel like doing but the camaraderie and social accountability make me stick with the course. These physical challenges are a way that help push us out of our comfort zone and remind us of the importance of the journey and training with friends, learning more about the land that we live in and hopefully completing a fun physical challenge.

We are all products of the natural world, not evolved for the sterile, sedentary confines of modern life and concrete jungles. Perhaps it’s time we start to reclaim our birthright as embodied, earth-connected beings, and find a way to balance the comforts of the present with the wisdom of the past.

What are your thoughts on this? Do you see a way to reconcile our primal selves with the realities of 21st century living?

The key to thriving in the 21st century may lie in understanding your primal self. Tune in next week to explore this powerful idea further.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. I find this topic really interesting and am thinking of writing more on it. If you agree, please let me know in the comments below! Thanks a mill. 

Dave x

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2

I remember so many times in Spring of 2020, during covid lockdowns, standing barefoot on the stony shoreline of the cove in Greystones, waves lapping at my feet, as I watched the sun rise above the horizon against a pink sky. The air was thick with the scent of salt and damp earth, and I could feel the potential in the day rising and the pulse of the tides resonating within my own body. In that moment, the boundaries between myself and the natural world seemed to dissolve, leaving me in a state of deep connection and awe.

We are Nature

At our core, you and I are not separate from nature – we are nature. The truth is, the natural world is not something “out there” that we observe and admire. It is something that flows through us, courses through our veins, and makes up the very fabric of our being.

Consider that one of the most complex ecosystems on the planet resides within your own gut – it hosts billions of microbes, a diverse community that is in constant dialogue with the rest of your body. This inner wilderness is just as much a part of the natural world as the forests, oceans, and skies outside your doors. The cycles and rhythms that sustain all life on this planet also animate the life within us, ebbing and flowing in perfect harmony and synchronicity.

Yet in our modern culture, I find that we’ve grown increasingly disconnected from this fundamental truth. We might have fallen into the trap of seeing ourselves as separate from nature, as somehow superior to or independent from the natural order. This has fueled a mindset of scarcity, where we grasp and hoard rather than allowing the regenerative abundance of the natural world to nourish us.

By reconnecting to the nature that ‘lives inside each of us’, we can begin to dissolve this artificial separation. We can attune ourselves to the cyclical patterns of growth and rest, expansion and contraction, that animate all living things. In doing so, we may find that our own lives become a seamless extension of the natural world – no longer at odds with it, but deeply connected as an integral, harmonious part of the great web of life.

This is the invitation before us: to remember that we are nature, and that the abundance and balance we seek is not something foreign, but a profound truth written into the very fabric of our being. When we live in alignment with this reality, we unlock a wellspring of vitality, creativity, and connection that can nourish us and the earth we call home.

Retuning to Nature’s Rhythms: What We Can Learn from the Cycles of the Natural World

In our fast-paced, technology-driven, concrete based modern life, it’s easy to lose touch with the natural rhythms that have guided life on this planet for millennia. Yet, by reconnecting with these cycles, we may unlock greater balance and harmony.

In nature, we witness the universal dance of day and night, the waxing and waning of the moon, the changing of the seasons. It is easy to forget these natural cycles yet they offer the opportunity to become profound teachers, if we choose to attune ourselves to their wisdom.

Consider the cycle of the seasons. In spring, the earth awakens with new growth and vitality. Summer brings a flourishing abundance, followed by autumn’s shedding and winter’s necessary rest and regeneration. This annual cycle mirrors the ebbs and flows we experience within ourselves.

As an identical twin who has always been driven and goal-oriented, learning to embrace the natural cycles of rest and renewal has been an ongoing practice for me. There have been countless times when I have pushed myself relentlessly, ignoring my body’s signals for a needed break. It has only been as I’ve gotten older and become more aware that maybe my deep seated need for productivity is likely rooted in an insecurity that I better understand the importance of allowing myself to ebb and flow like the tides. Just like night proceeds day, I need to prioritise rest, reflection in order to renew after demanding periods of focus and productivity.

By endeavouring to live more harmoniously with the cycles of nature, you will likely find that your stress levels decline, your creativity flourishes, and your sense of connection to the natural world, and to yourself, deepens. By returning to nature’s rhythms, we can rediscover the inherent balance and connection that has sustained life on this planet for Eons.

Abundance vs Scarcity

When I look to the natural world, I am met with an abundance that stands in stark contrast to the scarcity mindset so prevalent in modern human culture. The cycles of nature exemplify a generative, replenishing flow, rather than the linear, finite capitalist systems we have all grown accustomed to.

As I observe the seasons change each year, I’m struck by nature’s effortless cycles of renewal, of expansion and contraction. In spring, I witness the world springing forth with vibrant new life, blossoming into the lush abundance of summer. Even as autumn brings a shedding of leaves, the trees do not cling desperately to their resources. Instead, they gracefully let go, trusting in the replenishing rest of winter to revitalise them for the next cycle of growth. This pattern of expansion and contraction, of giving and receiving, sustains the natural world in a state of perpetual regeneration that I find profoundly inspiring.

In comparison, in our human society and culture we often operate from a mindset of scarcity, hoarding resources and guarding against perceived lack. Most of us have been conditioned to see the world as a zero-sum game, where one person’s gain must come at the expense of another. This mindset fuels competition, anxiety, much stress and the persistent illusion that there is never enough. Yet the abundance of nature reminds me that this is a construction of our own making, a man made creation, the universe from what I can see operates based on principles of complete abundance generously sharing resources without a sign of withholding.

I am inspired by the rhythms and generosity of the natural world. I believe there is much to learn about shedding the deep rooted scarcity mindset of modern culture. Leaning more open heartedly into giving and receiving and learning to not cling on to our money and materials so tightly. This likely sounds very idealistic but I believe we can learn to trust in the replenishing cycles that sustain all life, and find freedom in the knowledge that abundance is our natural birthright, not scarcity. In doing so, we open ourselves up to a more harmonious, fulfilling way of living with a much deeper connection to the earth and the natural world and creatures upon it. .

The natural world has touched me in so many ways, it connects me to myself in so many profound ways on a daily basis whether via my morning sunrise sea swims, running through the woods or working on our regenerative farm and learning more about how we can grow tasty nutritious food in the most harmonious way with nature. 

Thanks for reading this weeks ‘Happier’ column. I really appreciate it. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below and as always thanks to those who have left comments on previous articles, I really appreciate your input.

Lots of love,

Dave x

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2

We recorded a podcast last week with a Best Selling author and astrologer Kirsty Gallagher, and her words have been resonating with me ever since. She said a line that I found profoundly impactful: “Your purpose is you.” This simple yet powerful statement has been circling in my mind, serving as a great reminder whenever I catch myself falling into old patterns of feeling the urge to be productive or busy.

The concept of “purpose” can often feel lofty, nebulous and elusive, the source of many an existential crisis. Typically we look outward to find purpose through concrete achievements & goals, helping others, or fulfilling societal expectations, such as teaching children or tending to the needs of our community. But what if the key to unlocking our deepest sense of purpose lies not in the world beyond us, but within the very core of our authentic selves?

I’ve come to believe that our purpose is indeed rooted in becoming more fully who we are – embracing our true values, interests, and passions as the foundation for finding meaning and direction in our lives. It’s not about forcing ourselves into someone else’s or society’s mould, but about the courageous journey of unravelling the hidden layers within.

The more you become authentically yourself the more you give others permission to do the same. 

In our modern world of monoculture food and often homogenous values, where globalisation and Western consumerism are spreading across the globe – finding and expressing your true self is an act of rebellion and profound empowerment. What I love most about the idea of “your purpose being you” is that at its root lies the courageous journey toward your authentic self, your truest essence independent of external expectations.

You are fundamentally unique, you are 1 in 9 billion. Even me, as an identical mirror twin with 99.99% the same DNA as my twin Steve, I am completely unique too, as is Steve. The more we are brave enough to step into our individual light and shed the pervasive constricting values of Western capitalism, the more we in turn inspire others to follow suit. Just as a cold or flu is contagious, authenticity too has a viral quality – it inspires and spreads. We all want to feel free to be ourselves and sometimes seeing others being unapologetically themselves gives us permission in a sense. As Gandhi so eloquently stated, “be the change you wish to see in the world.” The more we embrace our authentic selves, the more we give others permission to do the same.

In a world that constantly pressures us to conform, to fit neatly into prescribed boxes, the act of self-discovery and self-expression becomes a quiet rebellion. When we have the courage to show up as our unvarnished selves, we create a ripple effect that can transform not only our own lives, but the lives of those around us. This is the true power of purpose – not found in external accomplishments, but in the beautiful, messy, ever-evolving journey of becoming who we were born to be.

It starts with acceptance and love

This week, I caught myself acting from that habitual, automatic urge and habit to be productive – an impulse that is so often rooted in fear. In that moment, the line “your purpose is you” spontaneously popped into my head, serving as a potent reminder. Instead of mindlessly forging ahead, I noticed a shift; self-compassion, self-acceptance, and even self-love began to arise within me. It felt like I was momentarily breaking free from entrenched patterns, no longer losing myself in the frenetic need to stay busy for busy’s sake, to be a productive cog in the machine. Productivity and busy-ness is a habit I’ve sometimes excelled at, equating my worth with the outward markers of productivity and achievement. 

But in that pivotal moment, I was able to pause, reconnect with my deeper self, and make a different choice. It was a small yet profound act of rebellion against the relentless pressure to conform to society’s narrow definitions of success. By choosing presence over productivity, I re-aligned with my deeper sense of who I am and what is important to me in the moment. This experience has reinforced my belief that our truest calling lies not in external accomplishments, but in the courageous journey of becoming more fully ourselves.

At the heart of living a purposeful life is the ability to fully accept and love yourself (last week’s column on ‘the wisdom of insecurity’ touched on this!). It is so easy to get caught up in the relentless pursuit of external validation, comparing ourselves to unrealistic standards and judging our worth based on others’ perceptions (previous Happier Column on Self worth). However, your unique purpose can only be found when you make peace with who you are at your core, flaws and all. Self-acceptance is not about complacency or becoming passive, but about creating a solid foundation from which you can grow and flourish. When you cultivate genuine self-love, you tap into your deepest desires, values, and unique gifts – the very building blocks of a fulfilling purpose.

Redefining success on your own terms

As identical twins and business owners, Steve and I are all too familiar with society’s often narrow definition of success, wealth, status and external achievements being touted as the hallmark of a life well lived. However, what if you took a step back and redefined success based on your deeper values and what really gives you meaning? 

What if you peel back the layers of societies ‘success programming’ and instead start to determine what really floats your boat, what makes your spirit soar and awakens a child-like wonder in you? Your purpose being you means that it needs to be a genuine expression of who you are. In my thirties I very much bought into the success equals social status paradigm and reflecting back I was the personification of success equals external achievements and impressing others. Now that I am a decade older, 44, I have largely shed this belief and find true success is quality time with my family and friends and spending time on the farm in nature. I still see the old habitual programming of seeking external validation arise but I find I am less susceptible to it than before! Progress over perfection!

The most meaningful purpose is found not in external achievements, but in the courageous act of becoming more fully yourself. May you have the courage to shed societal expectations and tap into the wellspring of purpose that lies within. Your unique gifts and authentic expression are a profound gift to the world. The more you do this, the more you inspire others to do the same. Together lets create a ripple of authenticity!

Thank you for taking the time to read this week’s Happier column. I hope the idea of “your purpose is you” has resonated and inspired you to embrace a more authentic and purposeful path. I have written many previous Happier columns exploring topics like self-worth, feeling enough, and living with greater intention which you can read here. 

All the best

Dave

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2

Insecurities in my romantic relationship

When I first started dating my wife Sabrina I used to get jealous when she would go out to parties or events without me. When she was away travelling for work or pleasure without me I would get jealous when she would talk about other guys she had met. I didn’t acknowledge this to her at the start but over time I couldn’t suppress it anymore and I was forced to look at it with her supportive help. Possibly on some level I may not have felt worthy or good enough that she would stay with me. We have now been together for 8 years and married for nearly 3 years. I remember that I sometimes felt embarrassed by my jealousy but I couldn’t help it. I don’t remember feeling jealous over the last few years, I know it has and possibly will provide a great opportunity for growth for me. 

I used to see insecurities – like my jealousy – as really negative, uncomfortable parts of myself that I just wanted to hide from everyone. I certainly didn’t want to acknowledge or share these insecurities, I preferred to sweep them under the metaphorical mat. I preferred to project the childish illusion that I was different and didn’t have any insecurities, that I had my ‘sh*t’ together. 

Recently while soaking in the bath, (my chosen place of solitude to reflect and pontificate) I was ruminating over the idea that insecurities and the pieces that we find most uncomfortable about ourselves can likely be our greatest teachers, our greatest opportunities for growth and increasing awareness. 

Failure being a better teacher than success

To share another example, I recently watched a clip of Ed Sheeran discussing his success. He emphasised that his achievements were due to hard work, not just raw talent. The interviewer suggested he was being humble, but Ed insisted otherwise. He pointed to a song he had published on YouTube at 14, four years before his breakthrough. His singing was rough, just as he described. Ed explained that failure had shaped him. He failed repeatedly until he could sing melodies and harmonies proficiently. “Success teaches you nothing,” he said. “Failure is the best teacher of all.” It’s humbling and often tough to swallow, but it builds real character.

This perspective on failure aligns with my own experiences. My insecurities, once seen as weaknesses, have provided opportunities for growth and self-awareness. Embracing failure and insecurity, rather than hiding from them, allows us to learn and grow. Just as Ed Sheeran didn’t shy away from his early, imperfect music, we can embrace our insecurities as part of our journey toward self-understanding and personal growth.

The wisdom of insecurity. 

Most of us unconsciously try to control our environment to varying degrees – with the goal to feel more secure. For example, we may look for security in our day to day jobs, for permanent contracts with good benefits like health insurance. We may marry to help provide some form of security that our spouse will not leave us as long as we are married. We may have pensions to help give us some financial security for the future. We are living trying to mitigate some future worries in the hope that we feel more secure and in control now. 

The illusion of security? 

While all this feels relatable to some degree, I wonder if this way of thinking is an illusion? We are not even in control of our own bodies, most processes happen automatically, breathing for example, it happens whether we are aware of it or not, the same goes for digestion, healing, pumping blood etc.

On a larger scale, each of us is just one among nearly 9 billion people living on a dynamic, ever-changing planet. We are part of complex webs of natural ecological systems, constantly in flux, alongside intricate human-made political and governing structures. This vast, unpredictable environment shows how the idea of security is an illusion and highlights the need to embrace life’s uncertainties.

I remember my granny, May, who died at 92, had most of her money in AIB bank stocks. Her husband, my grandfather, worked there, so they invested their savings in these seemingly safe, blue-chip stocks. However, the 2008 financial crash wiped out their value entirely. This experience highlights the illusion of security. Even the safest investments can become unstable, showing that true security is elusive and reinforcing the need to embrace life’s inherent uncertainties.

As is often said, change is the only real constant. I remember doing a 10-day silent meditation retreat in Boston over 22 years ago. We got up at 4:30 AM and meditated for about 14 hours a day in complete silence, with no reading, writing, or eye contact. One key message reinforced every day was that change is the only constant. This experience made me realise how true this is and highlighted the illusion of security. By accepting and embracing change, we can better handle life’s uncertainties and grow from our insecurities.

Embracing the insecurity of life

Uncertainty is deeply challenging, particularly with the rate of change that new tech is forcing upon us.  However, the very nature of life is uncertainty. Parts of me wish it wasn’t as then it might be more predictable and controllable. 

I think cultivating a deeper capacity to let go and not resist change is key to not ‘breaking’. I have a good few friends who have gone through tough burnouts. They were high achievers who worked really hard and also had high tendencies toward control. Yet ultimately their burnouts were a really tough messenger to help them to let go, to redefine their relationship with work and control by setting better boundaries and learning to let go of this idea of perfection. Trying to control something that is uncontrollable simply creates anxiety. Learning to let go and be more present with what is unfolding could possibly be a better strategy for feeling happier. 

Vulnerability – the ultimate connector

Insecurities make us more human and relatable yet most of us – like me – try to hide these feelings from others. I get it, I do the very same, as feeling vulnerable is uncomfortable. You usually feel exposed, sensitive and a bit raw and your ego and pride are suppressed. 

In my twenties I used to be so proud of any of my accomplishments and was only too happy to share them with anyone who was interested. I suppose I had an inflated sense of ego and then with the rise of social media this only added petrol to the fire. Maybe it is getting older or maybe it is spending much less time on social media and the endless game of likes and popularity but I feel much less concerned with impressing people. I like to think maybe I am just becoming more comfortable with my insecurities.

Most of us project an image of self-confidence and having our lives together. However, on the inside, we often feel insecure and vulnerable, sometimes even dealing with imposter syndrome daily. I believe we connect much more through these tender, insecure feelings than through our achievements and strengths. Everyone can relate to insecurities, challenges, and vulnerabilities. Embracing these aspects of ourselves can lead to deeper, more meaningful connections, embodying the wisdom of insecurity.

I think a key piece to feeling happier is becoming more ‘friendly’ with our insecurities and vulnerabilities. Insecurities are really tough and everyone deals with them, our internal struggles are likely much more relatable than any accomplishments we may have had. 

What do you think? What insecurities drive you? I would love to know your thoughts. Thank you for taking the time to read this. If you want to add to the conversation leave a comment below and if you want to read some of my other happier columns I have written 13 now, you can find my previous Happier columns here 

All the best

Dave x

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2

Sitting soaking in the bath I watched a short video by Alan Watts about not forcing anything. It made me reflect on the question: How can I live with more ease and less striving and forcing? 

As I reflect, I wonder about how you and I are a product of our current culture of quicker, faster, now! In comparison, I marvel at the effortlessness of nature. Lao Tzu, the late Chinese philosopher said “Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.” I wonder how I can live more in harmony with this natural flow, with the rhythm of nature. And ultimately, how I can live with more ease, more flow and alignment?

Does effort equate to success? 

In today’s world, success is often equated with effort. The harder you work, the more you achieve, right? ‘No pain, no gain’. I wonder do we have this wrong? I have been as susceptible to this as anyone. As an identical twin, I certainly embodied this effort equates to success idea. When Steve and I were younger and more competitive we were always striving to outdo one another, and as a result were often ‘busy fools’, busy striving for unimportant things!I wonder if the key to achieving more is actually to do less and use the extra time to ensure that what you are doing aligns with what is truly important to you? Your actions will likely be better directed, helping you to avoid the pitfall of tirelessly chasing unworthy goals.

I reflect on some key moments in my life, some of the most pivotal life events just seemed to have happened without any striving or struggle, they simply unfolded with ease. 

For example, my wife Sabrina and I were lucky enough to buy our current home in 2021, while we weren’t even looking for a house, a friend sent me a message with a link to it and before I knew it, we were going to see it. In fact, it was the first house we ever went to see. There was of course some back and forth with mortgages etc. but it all unfolded with an ease to it that felt a little like there might have been an invisible hand helping to guide the process. I don’t know if it was meant to be or that the timing was just right, either way it just unfolded seamlessly. 

My Little Guru

My third daughter, Fia, is now 9 months old and started trying to walk. Watching her take her first steps with the help of her walker is truly amazing. She isn’t in any rush or hurry; she’s not striving to walk or even particularly concerned about it. I don’t even know if she is conscious that she is trying to walk. It just seems to be happening naturally, in its own rhythm, and in its own time, very much like nature just exists and trees just grow. 

It was the same easy natural unfolding as we watched her learn to roll over and then crawl. Observing Fia reminds me that when we are aligned and present with what is unfolding, circumstances tend to flow and unfold in a more effortless manner. In my perspective, babies are the purest form of human with little to no conditioning, they are closest to the source, this is my I look to baby Fia as my guru!

Is the journey the destination?

Early last year, I noticed a persistent low-level anxiety following me around, especially regarding work. We weren’t hitting our targets, and it felt overwhelming. To overcome this, I decided to let go of focusing on goals and outcomes and instead chose to concentrate on the journey, the process and the things I can control. I remember at the time we had lots of goals on digital course sales and membership sign ups which we weren’t hitting. I instead focused on my process of sharing really good content that might inspire people to sign up rather than stressing over what I couldn’t control. This simple shift helped me manage stress and anxiety much more effectively.

Acceptance vs resistance. 

I’ve noticed that struggle, striving, and hustling often come from resisting reality—trying to force things to go the way we want. Acceptance, on the other hand, isn’t about giving up or letting life bowl us over. It’s about recognising and aligning with what’s actually happening. 

When I accept things as they are, I feel more in harmony with life. For example, yesterday I was frustrated that my 13-year-old daughter Elsie was taking so long to get ready in the morning. We had planned to go to a cafe, and she took more than 20 minutes to get dressed, so my impatience was growing. Realising my frustration wasn’t helping either of us feel better, I told her I’d walk ahead and meet her there. 

This small shift made such a big difference. Instead of stewing in annoyance, I enjoyed a leisurely walk and was in a much better mood when she arrived. I wrote about acceptance in terms of having enough in a previous Happier column titled: ‘Feeling enough’. 

Acceptance embodies the principle that, in this present moment, your most basic needs are likely met. Needs and wants are quite different. A key to experiencing less effort and more ease is to be happy with what you have by accepting your current situation.

Aligning with Nature’s pace

I ran along the cliffs this morning as the sun was rising and I marvelled at how nature unfolds with ease and balance. Just as seasons change smoothly and rivers flow naturally, nature shows us a harmonious way of living. Trees grow and shed leaves effortlessly, animals follow natural rhythms, and ecosystems thrive through connections.

An essential aspect of this harmony is recognizing that humans are not separate from nature but an integral part of it. As Alan Watts beautifully put it, “We do not ‘come into’ this world; we come out of it, as leaves from a tree.” By understanding and embracing this interconnectedness, we can live more harmoniously and simply.

Nature has seasons, there is winter and summer, night and day. Yet modern human culture tends to be ‘always on’, usually striving forward on a mission to accomplish something. Instead, if we can mimic some of these natural processes, such as rest and growth we can bring more harmony into our lives.

Where we live in Greystones, we do our best to foster and nurture a strong sense of community just like the roots of a tree interconnecting with the mycelium and roots of the forest to support and nourish together. Nature’s wisdom shows us that aligning with it can lead to greater ease and harmony in our daily existence.

Simplifying Your Life: Knowing When Enough is Enough

Simplifying your life is about recognizing when enough is truly enough. In a world where the goalposts are constantly shifting and material pursuits never seem to end, I find it crucial to pause and reflect on what truly matters. By focusing on essentials and letting go of unnecessary clutter—both physically and mentally—we can find greater peace and contentment. 

Coming back to the example of housing, we moved from a normal sized family home to a small town house 5 years ago before buying our home a year after that. It had 2 small bedrooms and no storage space. As we moved, we were forced to let go of everything that wasn’t essential to fit it all into those 2 bedrooms. I remember that it was tough at the time, yet somehow liberating to let go and to gift some of the things we thought were important to friends and the community. 

To me, simplifying means valuing experiences over possessions, nurturing relationships over accumulating more stuff, and finding joy in simple, everyday moments like I wrote about in a previous Happier Column on taking a daily 1 hour holiday. Learning to live a simpler life can help us to stop chasing after endless goals, and instead appreciate the abundance that is already present in our lives. 

To be really honest, I don’t have all the answers about living a more effortless life. I am on the same journey as you are. And I wish you more ease, more flow and alignment moving forward. I hope that struggle is a less common guest at your table and when you must carry a burden, I hope you can embrace a little more acceptance. Life is so rich and the more ease and presence we can cultivate, the more joy we are likely to experience. 

Thank you for reading my writings, I get so much joy from it and I really hope they help you in some way. If you have anything to share on this topic please leave a comment below. 

Thanks a mill. 

All the best

Dave x

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2

What does failure have to do with feeling happier? 

As I sit on a plane travelling home after a busy couple of days in London I reflect on the subtle opportunity within failure. Failure is an interesting thing, perceived as a destination of sorts yet I see it more like feedback and information on a journey toward anything worthwhile. It is a core part of the human experience. Failure has taught me more than success. At times, it is a cruel teacher. One that dents pride and ego. I have found that failure has helped me strip away, leaving a more authentic and aligned version of who I am. 

FAILURE CAN BE A HELPFUL GUIDE 

Failure is an essential step on the journey to accomplish anything of meaning. In 2008, we had a sprout farm as part of The Happy Pear that grew wheatgrass and sprouts like alfalfa. At the time, there was a highly publicized E. coli outbreak linked to sprouts in Germany (which later turned out to be unfounded). As a result, our entire sprout business collapsed virtually overnight. We were devastated and unsure of what to do next.

At the time, Steve had a great sundried tomato recipe that mom used to make 10 tubs of a week that we sold in our veg shop. With the sprout business stagnant, our brother Darragh, who was running that operation, decided to try selling the pesto to local shops instead. The pesto turned out to be a lifeline and the rest, as they say, is history. This failure ultimately led to the birth of our thriving food products business, which has since sold over 15 million products. This experience taught us the invaluable lesson that failure, while painful in the moment, can sometimes be the catalyst for unexpected success and growth. 

FAILURE IS ONLY FAILURE WHEN YOU STOP

Thomas Edison, on his journey to inventing the lightbulb, said: “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” James Dyson’s journey to creating his iconic Dyson vacuum exemplifies the power of this perspective. Over 15 years, he created 5,127 unsuccessful prototypes, amassing a whopping £15m in personal debt before landing on the final breakthrough model. But Dyson’s willingness to learn from each “dead end”, reframing them as essential steps, ultimately paid off in 1993 when he launched the first Dyson vacuum, a huge commercial success.

This year,I reflect on our 20 year long journey of The Happy Pear and it has not been linear – While it might appear so looking back over 20 years, our perspective from the driver’s seat is that it has been a squiggly path of two steps forward and one or two steps back. 

Cultivating persistence and becoming comfortable in the face of setbacks has been critical. True failure only occurs when you stop trying and cease learning from your experiences.

Reframing failure as feedback and an opportunity to grow, rather than a dead end, is a mindset that Steve and I do our very best to embody. This perspective has ensured we’ve been able to stay the course for over 20 years since starting The Happy Pear, even through the often tough and challenging times. 

THE SILVER LINING OF FAILURE

There is a silver lining in Failure. However, one must be open-minded and willing to see past the initial perception of failure. Failure offers the same opportunity for metamorphosis as the transformation of a caterpillar into a butterfly which inevitably is painful. Like Dyson and Edisson, some of the greatest inventions and most successful endeavours are usually built upon the foundations of past failures. It is frequently these stumbles along the way that put pioneers on a different, yet more meaningful path than they had initially anticipated.

Let’s come back to The Happy Pear: The very impetus for our business only came after Steve and I had lost our way. We were 21 and went through a really challenging metamorphosis, a period of rediscovery that shook us to our core. We both gave up alcohol (which at the time was only for 2 weeks, a habit that has now lasted over 20 years). At the same time, we adopted a plant based diet, got interested in yoga and meditation and let go of our old identity of self proclaimed meat eating jocks and in the process, we lost what we had in common with our old friend group. 

It was only on our journey to support our new lifestyle and find a new tribe that we found the inspiration and impetus to create The Happy Pear. It emerged out of necessity in a sense. We needed support to continue on our new lifestyle. It was a total identity crisis in which even our parents and community thought we had lost our way. However it became the greatest catalyst for purposeful work and fulfilment that we could have imagined. 

To me, the silver lining in failure lies in its power to propel us towards our truest selves and most fulfilling ventures, if we have the courage to sit with the discomfort and face it head-on. It is a crucible from which the phoenix of our dreams can rise anew.

Let me know your thoughts on failure? It is often a tough teacher. What is your relationship with it? Apologies if this is a sensitive topic, I am sharing my experience and views on it. I would love to hear from you in the comments if you feel like sharing. Also thanks for reading this Happier Column, I greatly appreciate your support. 

Thanks,

Dave

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2

The greatest tool you have to destress is right under your nose

I was truly amazed to learn that each of us takes between 18,000 to 25,000 breaths each day—that’s a staggering number! Imagine what would happen if you could optimise these breaths to help you to feel more relaxed, at ease and in alignment with life? Well you can!!

Like you, I’ve noticed how my breathing changes with my mood. Picture a relaxing evening unwinding with a hot shower or enjoying a lazy Sunday brunch with loved ones—our breaths naturally deepen, slow down, and elongate. This shift signals that our nervous system has entered the ‘rest and restore’ mode (part of the sympathetic nervous system), where our bodies relax and rejuvenate. In contrast, when stress or anxiety hits and we feel swamped, our breathing patterns shift dramatically—it becomes quick, short, and shallow. This is a clear sign that we’ve flipped into the ‘fight or flight’ mode, fueled by adrenaline and driven by the parasympathetic nervous system, often fixating our minds on worries about the past or the future.

This intricate dance between our breathing and our emotions underscores just how powerful our breath can be. It not only keeps us alive but also plays a critical role in helping us feel more at ease, relaxed, and in tune with the present moment—essentially, it helps us to flow through life with greater happiness. Isn’t it amazing that something as simple as breathing, which we usually do without even thinking, can have such a profound impact on our well-being? 😊

HOW ARE YOU BREATHING NOW?

Let me invite you to a little experiment:, While you are reading this, slowly become aware of your breathing, and start to lengthen and deepen it with every inhale. You might have to straighten up slightly to do so. As you start to breathe more consciously, I invite you to think about the last time you felt wound up and overwhelmed —perhaps after a long tough day where nothing seemed to go your way.  Chances are, your breath was shallow in that moment, short and quick mirroring your inner turmoil. 

Now, imagine shifting that anxiety and tension by simply changing the way you breathe, to slow it down, to deepen your breath and signal to your body and your nervous system that all is ok, that you are safe to relax. How you and I breath is such a useful tool to have  that’s always with you. It just requires your attention and conscious focus. By taking a few moments to focus on deepening your breathing, you can guide your body back into a state of calm, telling your brain that it’s time to relax. 

AN EASY WAY I MAKE IT PART OF MY LIFE

When I feel overwhelmed and stressed I often end up doing 5 to10 minutes of deep breathing on a free ios app called ‘Breathing app’. I generally do this while driving on the days that I feel overwhelmed (and ironically need it most!) I rarely can justify the time thus I end up doing it in the car which seems to be the only option! I set it it to a 5:7 breathing ratio, which means that I breathe in for 5 seconds and breathe out for 7 seconds.This helps relax my nervous system and signals to my nervous system that I am safe and it’s ok to relax, I literally feel my shoulders drop and heart rate slow down and the tension that holds me loosens its grip.

This simple act of taking a few deep breaths for a few minutes whenever you need it can be a lifeline in stressful situations, helping you regain composure and approach challenging situations with a clearer mind. I invite you to give it a try next time you’re feeling overwhelmed and watch how it can transform not just your moment, but potentially your entire day.

IT SEEMS SO SIMPLE YET IS FUNDAMENTAL

To me, this simple yet profound technique of conscious breathing isn’t just about managing moments of anxiety—it’s about transforming our everyday life into a more joyful and relaxed experience. If you’re intrigued by the potential of breathwork and want to explore further, I can recommend engaging in activities like yoga, meditation, or even specialized breathwork classes. These practices integrate deep breathing as a fundamental aspect, helping you harness its benefits more fully.

Remember, the powerful tool of conscious relaxed breathing is free and available to you at any moment—whether you’re sitting in traffic, preparing for a meeting, or just winding down at the end of the day. 

I craft each ‘Happier’ column with the goal of offering you practical insights and useful tips. My aim is to explore simple changes we can make in our daily lives that might just make us a bit happier. It’s easy to cruise through life on autopilot, adhering to societal norms without questioning whether they truly serve us. Yet, I believe that both you and I have untapped potential to inspire each other and create a positive ripple effect in our communities. While this might sound a bit lofty, I’m genuinely enjoying this journey and am truly grateful for your time and attention to my writing.

Thank you so much for reading, engaging with, and commenting on my work—your interaction means a lot to me. Through my weekly ‘Happier’ column, I hope to inspire you to feel a little more content and in command of your emotional health. Remember, the most potent tool you have to reduce stress is always right under your nose. Here’s to breathing easier and living a happier life! Please let me know your thoughts in the comments below. Thanks a mill. Dave.

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2

As I sit in the bath, unwinding after a busy day, contemplating life, I come back to the question: is there any proof that life has to be serious? And if it doesn’t, could it be that joy, much like seriousness, is something we can cultivate as a habit?  

Personally, I believe that seriousness can be a habit, a learned behaviour that we unconsciously pick up from society at large. ‘Stop laughing, stop messing – this is a serious matter!’ was a line I remember being told to me countless times growing up . Obviously being serious has its place and there are moments when it is required, however, I wonder if we have gone too far and is it time to re habituate ourselves with how to experience a little more joy on a daily basis? 

I observe one of my greatest teachers daily—my 8-month-old daughter, baby Fia. Her eagerness to participate in household chores, from washing the dishes to filling the dishwasher and even mopping the floor, is a lesson in itself. For Fia, there is no distinction between work and play; every activity is approached with an open, curious attitude. Each moment is an adventure, an opportunity for exploration and joy. This seamless integration of curiosity and play into daily tasks reminds me that perhaps, the boundaries we place between ‘work’ and ‘play’ are artificial constructs rather than absolute truths.

From Human Being into Human doing?

I worry if we are becoming more machine-like in our relentless quest for efficiency? In our drive to optimise every minute of our day, I am asking myself if we are losing the essence of what it means to be human? It seems like we may be evolving from being human beings—creatures of experience and emotion—to human doings, where our worth is measured by our productivity and output. This shift seems to strip us of our humanity, reducing our lives to a checklist of tasks rather than a rich tapestry of experiences.

Why is work typically associated with toil and hardship? This view, which sees work solely as a burdensome necessity for livelihood, is ripe for reimagining. What if we could approach work with the same curiosity and joy that children like baby Fia bring to their explorations? 

By shifting our perspective, work can transform from a series of mundane duties into a canvas for creativity and a source of deep satisfaction. Understanding the true worth of our tasks and seeing them as chances for personal growth and contributions to greater causes can transform work from merely a way to make ends meet into a fulfilling aspect of our lives. I know this might sound very grandiose but I believe our perspective and how we approach work can be the pivotal point. 

I wrote about turning routines into rituals in one of my earlier Happier Columns, about approaching mundane everyday tasks with an attitude of presence and imbuing it with a sprinkle of sacredness can transform the experience. By shifting our mindset from just getting through each day to actively seeking out meaning and joy, we can improve both our work satisfaction and our overall well-being.

Lessons from 1000 elderly Americans

In his book 30 lessons for living gerontologist Karl Pilemer interviewed 1000 elderly Americans looking for the most important lessons they learnt from decades of life experience. Here is what they said:

• No-one, not a single person out of a thousand, said that to be happy you should try to work as hard as you can to make money in order to buy the things you want 
• No-one, not a single person out of a thousand, said that it is important to be at least as wealthy as those around you and if you have more than them then it’s real success. 
• No-one not a single person, said you should decide your work based on your desired future earning power 
• What they did value was things like quality friendships, being part of something bigger than themselves 
• Spending quality unstructured time with their children. “Your kids don’t want your money or what your money buys anywhere near as much as they want you, specifically they want you with them”, Pilemer writes.

Karl Pilemer’s findings lead me to a cheeky realisation: are many of us just being busy fools? Many of us hustle hard for more stuff, adopting a serious, all-go-no-stop attitude that can actually make us miss out on what’s truly valuable—like laughing with friends or lazy Sunday mornings with the kids. Maybe it is time we ease up on the gas pedal a bit, swap some of that efficiency for reflection, and sprinkle a little more fun and play into our days. After all, it seems that the best parts of life might just be the moments we aren’t working so hard to accomplish a goal.

A theme that I often journal on is, “How can I infuse today’s responsibilities and duties with more joy and ease?” This inquiry not only challenges the seriousness and heaviness commonly associated with my daily tasks but also steers me towards a more fulfilling engagement with life.

So, what do you think? Do you find yourself caught up in the hustle for more, sometimes missing the moments that truly matter? I’d love to hear if this strikes a chord with you. How do you balance the daily grind with making time for joy and play? Let’s chat about ways we can inject a bit more lightheartedness and creativity into our routines, and maybe, just maybe, let go of what might be some of that habitual seriousness. Share your thoughts in the comments below and let’s inspire each other to live a little lighter every day!

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2

A dear friend of mine, Andrea has a knack for finding joy in the simplest moments, he always seems to have time to be present with people and is very rarely in a rush. He’s a special man. A few years ago, over a morning coffee, the sounds of our laughter and the clinking of coffee cups, he shared a concept that I adore: the ‘1 Hour Holiday.’ 

‘You see, Dave,’ he began in his melodious Italian accent, ‘why should we wait for a special occasion to feel free and joyful?’ His question struck a chord. Here was a man who is very skilled at the art of savouring life’s daily pleasures, no matter what the situation or weather. 

When I’m on holiday, I always notice a shift in my perspective. I feel lighter, my shoulders drop and the usual daily worries are left at home. Suddenly, the small concerns that can occupy my mind seem trivial. I find myself savouring the warmth of the sun against my skin, engaging in long, unhurried conversations with locals or fellow travellers, reconnecting, remembering the joy in simply being. 

Reflecting on this, it strikes me how starkly different the holiday perspective is from most of our day-to-day lives back home. My days are pretty packed – with a bustling family life having my three daughters including baby Fia, who is just 8 months old, and my responsibilities at The Happy Pear, it’s safe to say my days are full! My day to day life is led by my diary and my task list seems to grow and expand by the hour! Finding space to reflect can be a coveted commodity. Often, I feel like a piece of driftwood at sea, tossed around by the relentless waves of daily life!

Andrea’s ‘1 Hour Holiday’ concept deeply resonated with me, posing a compelling question: Why should we wait for a special occasion or a holiday to feel free and joyful? His idea is remarkably achievable and straightforward. Imagine integrating that holiday perspective – the lightness of spirit, the presence, the appreciation – into your everyday life, even if just for an hour. This hour doesn’t even need to be continuous; it can be divided into two thirty-minute segments or maybe you start with a daily 30 minute holiday.

The main point is how can we infuse our daily lives with the same attitude and spirit we embrace during holidays? Despite the undeniable increase in responsibilities, deadlines, and stress in our regular routines, opportunities still exist to infuse our days with a slice of that holiday spirit. How can we capture that sense of freedom and light-heartedness and weave it into the fabric of our everyday lives? Small acts, such as enjoying a quiet coffee, stepping outside to bask in the sunlight, or engaging more wholeheartedly in conversations without haste, can significantly help us embody that holiday spirit on a more consistent basis.

My personal ‘1 Hour Holiday’ typically unfolds between 5:30 and 7:00 AM. This early morning slot is when I’m truly a free agent, untouched by the day’s obligations. While it may be an ungodly hour for some, for me, it’s my soul time. It’s a period devoid of commitments, allowing me to indulge in activities that rejuvenate my spirit – be it running, swimming, enjoying coffee with friends, doing yoga, journaling, or even sneaking in a quick nap. Whatever I choose, this time is sacred to me, a true holiday from the daily grind. Just this morning, for instance, I started the day swimming at sunrise around 5:30 AM with Linda, Detty, Steve & Raj. This was followed by coffee and chats with Raj and Steve, and then a run with my brothers, Steve and Darragh, from 6:15 to 7:00 AM. It was sheer bliss, a slice of holiday magic in my everyday life. (You can read more about my morning routine here) 

Incorporating the ‘1 Hour Holiday’ into your daily routine isn’t just a pleasant idea – it’s a transformative practice that can significantly enhance the quality of your day to day life. I challenge you to identify a time slot, even if it’s not a full hour, to dedicate solely to activities that bring you joy and relaxation, just like on a holiday. It could be early in the morning, like my sacred 5:30 to 7 AM slot, or a quiet time in the evening. The key is consistency and intentionality. Whether it’s a brisk walk, reading a book, savouring your morning coffee, a lunchtime walk or simply sitting quietly with your thoughts, make this time a non-negotiable date with yourself. Over time, you may find these moments are not just breaks in your routine, but essential components that enrich your entire day.

I deeply appreciate your engagement and comments on these ‘Happier Articles’ that I am writing. I love writing them and I cherish your insights, feedback and comments. If you’ve enjoyed this concept of the ‘1 Hour Holiday’, consider reading some of the other 8 Happier articles I’ve written. 

Together, let’s continue to discover and implement small, practical ways to bring more joy and presence into our daily lives. What does your ‘1 Hour Holiday’ look like? Share your thoughts in the comments below and let’s inspire each other to live more fully, every single day.

More ‘Happier’ Articles

• 
  Ireland and UK Tour 2024/2025
• 
  Becoming More Embodied
• 
  The Comfort Trap Part 2